Sunday, April 25, 2010

Lost Friends....

I'm sitting on the plane..heading to DC for another business trip...thinking about how this year has changed so much and it's only April.... I lost a few friends this year... Mostly because I'm tryin to change my lifestyle, focus on bettering the lives of my family members, distance myself from unwanted drama and negative energy....I'm usally labeled "selfish" because when I don't like something or feel uncomfortable about something I get away from it....maybe that is selfish... But I'm human, I have flaws... I'm not wise on all my decisions but I do follow my instinct and it has kept me alive and out of drama for a few years now.. This change of mindstate has helped me attract some really good people in my life and it has also painfully made me distance myself from people I love dearly based on their surroundings and actions... My life hasn't been easy, and change isn't easy ... So I try not relaspe in bad habits.... I was back home in the projects and I know at this point of my life I can now visit my old hoods and stay out of the hood beefs.... It do hurt to see my friends beefing with each other... So I distance myself from them to run away from the pain of "disappointment" ...back in Atlanta, I had to distance myself from friends for getting caught up in this fake "Hollywood" bullshit...losing their souls to be liked by people they don't even need in their life to better their growth....I don't know it all so I never give advice on a matter I haven't lived through before... If I have made a mistake I try to help those around me not make the same mistakes....if you do ask me for my words of advice... turn around and don't trust me judgement and make the mistake anyway.. It's simple don't come to me after it's over like I suppose to stop my life and wipe your tears when I warned you in the first place.. Friendship should be based on good company, positve energy, and helping each other grow.... If you don't want to change then I have a choice not to be around you anymore... I'm working on trying to be a better man myself... And I'm a father of three...if something isn't right.... I warn you and you don't trust my judgement then I'm not really needed in your life... I guess I am selfish....I do have tunnel vision... Maybe the books "The Secret" & "48 Laws of Power" has changed how I view my life and the people I want to share personal time with....or maybe I'm just growing older and understand the value of "TIME" more....I can't tell others how to live their lives so I hope they will learn by my own actions....losing friends is very painful but who said rebirth wouldn't hurt?



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